My LMS adventure

This is a lesson from knitting. Since my mind has cleared and I have energy, I've started some knitting. These are simple lace patterns, but sometimes.... I have to start over... and sometimes I just don't want to start. All beginnings are like that. When we haven't done something, it is scary. After we've been to a new place several times, or we've driven across country, it no longer seems scary. I try to remember this... so new beginnings are just a reminder that they'll be familiar territory soon.

who I am.... I'm a 54 year old woman who lives in Tampa, Florida. I've been reading science fiction since I was 13. I've been sober since I was 23. I have an adult daughter who lives in Indiana. She's married, and has an adorable husband, cat and dog. I knit because I enjoy knitting.... and rarely wear the items I knit. When I first moved to Florida, I was broke and consulting. During that winter, I spent 4 months in Key West on an assignment. It was glorious. I went back to college when I was 34, and got my Bachelor's in Health Information Management at age 39. I have a credential of RHIA. (Registered Health Information Administrator). I am currently unemployed due to my illness. My love life has been non-traditional. I was married at 21, divorced at 23. Since then I've had several 5 to 16 year relationships. I grew up in a suburb of Indianapolis, and moved to Florida when I was 48. Prior to that I had never lived outside Indiana.

After careful consideration, I've finally posted about the cancer on Facebook. Based on other's experiences, I'm not going to work again... and the main reason for silence was to prevent damage to my career. Part of this is due to the Supportive Therapy appointments, where we've discussed the grim reality.... getting Advance Directives signed and long term options. And when they talk long term, they're talking one year. I'm hoping for good news in July after the PET/MRI. BUT... I've lived my life, and enjoyed it. If this is the end, I'm grateful for the many, many wonderful moments.

After the hospital stay at the end of April (for pneumonia, cardiac arythmia, and a urinary tract infection), I'm on steroids for the lungs. No chemo until June 1st. In the meanwhile. In one week, my sense of taste was back. My sense of smell is actually better than before I got sick. My energy levels are returning to normal after two weeks. My ability to focus and maintain a conversation, almost normal also. I've been knitting a simple lace pattern, and have grown bored with it. This is progress. During Chemo, I was able to do "idiot knitting" -- simple, no fancy stitches. The skin on my hands is rough, but not painful, and not shedding. I'm moisturizing as much as possible. My feet are the same. (The Hand and Foot Syndrome) So at this point, even the worst symptoms are almost normal. I'm hoping this short recovery shows how I'll "bounce back" when I can stop chemo completely. During this hiatus, I'm visiting friends, r

It was a Monday morning. I checked my appointments, seeing my oncologist, chemo was cancelled due to problems the previous week. I know I'm out of shape... too much fatigue, too little time upright. My heart was racing. I was hauling my knitting bag, with a couple books... okay, about 15 pounds of activities for the several hours I'd be at the infusion center. I didn't eat breakfast, figured I'd grab some cheesy grits at the hospital cafeteria. So I went into the appointment, tired, frazzled and run down. Only it was more than that. The reason I was wheezing and tired was pneumonia.... and the heart racing worried the doctor ("Gee Doc, I'm just out of shape...") So they called down to the Referral Center (what a nice name for Admissions). I hung out there... was poked, prodded, tested and my clothes were stored in my knitting bag. I wasn't getting enough oxygen (due to the pneumonia...) Long story short, (too late) I was admitted, and sp